{a / lone} / [man]

… and so it’s fine to be

what

you wanted so long: 

but equally

to feel the loneliness 

of long-distanced 

sinner – this is

a hard

tab-

let of hired sums to take 

whys.

i wronged so many people – 

and have longed just

for the love of

four.

and i lost all four, in

some way 

strange, and ranged against my

whiles 

like time slipping

down barrels of

ancient blunder,

bust.

and a flush of inexpertly 

cast lifetime-

experienced cards

which only 

hardened their resolve

(the four!) to unlove 

categorically, as

cold Victorian 

classification,

my heart and 

soul 

and mild and mould:

what a tough lesson that 

has been,

and gone and 

deemed subsumed, 

and ultimate-

like 

resumed.

and so the 

last of this four is the

only door

i now approach.

no other 

can i love, resisted 

as clearly 

as i’ve become.

a lone man, then,

is the priceless cost of 

finding oneself 

again.

rendered, first, half-

orange,

and then madly blue; only 

to encounter final 

peace in a wisdom of future

yellow.

a goodbye from the past;

this hello 

to the next.

the learning of this 

human seen who 

begins 

to start – again – 

{al[l]-

one}.




Leave a reply:

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s