Losing my respect [for you]

You respect and take note of those

who take note of what you

feel, and reveal and

communicate, not con-

t-

age-

ing nor waging

as war against unknowing 

person nor

citizenry lost.

But if you find it so damn

easy to ignore a

mighty slight from the land of

another’s clearly wrought

wrinkle-free

iron[ed] gates of

hateful ig-

nor-

[st]ance

and wasteful ig-

nor-

[d]ance

and determined re-

sis

tance,

then appreciate this, if 

appreciate anything 

you still are capable of

delivering thus:

I remember and hurt 

from the world of 

those whose will and

ways I still do trust

but where you no

longer 

command my love

is where you now

have shown so clear that

not even 

mere adherence 

to

letter of legal lawyerly 

law, and right and

wrong stated

strong,

is something you a-

spire to 

and is something to a-

spear to, like surgically 

destroying and primitive

con

flirt (you remember now

I’m sure …).

In truth, what is left 

for me to 

say to

you is but one tiny

thing:

where I no longer care 

for you 

at all 

is because 

you stopped respecting me 

enough to treat me 

as I properly deserved,

and was due

and should’ve seen

and felt 

and touched

and sensed 

and had as mine,

and enjoyed as any

ordinary 

folk;

and where I 

continue to care for

you – even 

so, even 

where I should really

not – is where 

still it is

manifest that whilst you

have treated me like

shit squared and cubed,

another has formerly

treated you far worse. 

And so it becomes my gentle

job, as captain of tiny

platoon, not to

abandon you to vicissitudes 

multiple out here but 

note and

remember 

you are human too.

And whilst this is the case

and the race to the 

bottom has downed all our

tools so no human now

is quite the humane

(fig. 1) of real prior pride, 

there yet does remain 

a semblance 

in some place of the world

I once thought might 

exist.  And though 

you have now 

lost me forever through

your guiles and 

foolish over-

wrought ways of nudging 

and fucking 

me around without 

taking ownership for what 

you’ve been doing,

there are still some good folks 

who still make the grade, and

though it is true they

also have failed 

me, at least to my mind 

they deserve second chances:

like the half-life of

atom, they tick away alive and

do simply remind you

that humanity was once 

grand.

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