Love my eldest very much. Always there for me. Doesn’t know the right thing to say so much as automatically say the right thing, ‘cos that’s what he feels: no need to fake it.
We had a long chat, and it was good. And so maybe my life moves on.
And hopefully I can at last learn from the mistakes I have made in the past. I feel like that Queen song, actually. “We Are The Champions” has a lyric I so identify with.
Not out of hubris, though. Not out of a sticking-my-chest-out pridefully kind of way. Not that way. Just what my life has been about. Champions not in the sense of beating anyone else, either. Champions in the sense of overcoming one’s own frailties. Know what I mean?
I just need to find the right people to have around me, and I’ll be happy. I’ll be OK. I’ll be cool.
I just need people to speak with, really nothing more: people who are straightforward and sincere and cool and interesting and intelligent and quirky and downright and just bloody funny … funny, yer know? Really, do yer not know?
And one more thing: I also only want those who are good for me. Those out to hurt or take advantage of me are no longer people I wish to tolerate. And I’m beginning to learn how not to. And I guess any learning, however positive, is always going to hurt at the start. And I guess that hurtful start is where I now find myself. And I guess that’s when change truly begins to happen.