[Error]s [& Sees] (or the terror of the old)

 

You want me to become

tempered:

humoured like a BBQ-ed beef

against

certain ways of doing

stuffed Turkey through violence of

deed and derisory

thought:

and it’s true and you’ve

achieved the goal

you set out

for yourself in so many ways:

I am no longer fearful

of so many

things; I am no longer

fearful of

being me and

losing you.

 

And I care little for fearing

the ways of flight; and I care

less for the fears of

making light of my love

because heavy does frighten

and terror-

eyes away the reality of

someone else’s

reality.

 

And I no longer want to be

at your beck;

and calling is only for

those with boring

profession; and though I feel in

love so often with so

many out there, with so

many good, the truth

of the matter is I’m clearly

doing it all

wrong (or at least so I must

generally conclude; at least that

cud chewed does

inform);

but I really don’t care any

more, you know; I really

don’t give a frigging

fuck.

 

 

For if truth be told, and lives be

sold, and hands be

held, and kisses be exchanged

through lips of love and

gentle embrace and toughened

haste, and even

via

the higher proclamations

of romantic attachments,

forgotten like naked emails and

abandoned to the

ether of either

you and me, or another

who might’ve tried

beside,

the error of terror in our nowadays

world lies precisely not in

the violence others

commit –

though the Lord only knows the

evil it [propa-

{gates] shut the chances} civilisation

does have (in

deeds)

to en-

gender a far better world of

sex, love and

hope, and a kinda bespoke way

of doing things – but in our crass

inability to make our life clearly

ours and only

ours: to drum into sensibility and

radical cojones the would and

the fact that

the error of terror lies

truly in not facing it; in not

realising the ways forward

lie precisely in

being fearlessly in favour of not fearing

it when

it’s out there in

its criminality: shameful and sheer in

its terrifying reach.

 

And whilst this is so hard

to fully

under-

stand, life does need the terror that the

new does infuse; for only through such

new, so painfully acquired, will

we ever succeed in

vanquishing the terror of the old.

 

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